Revenge

Or, why people do it.

“There’s nothing like revenge for getting back at people.” - Lenny, in The Simpsons. “I don’t know. Vengeance is good.” - Karl’s response.

With Donald Trump’s return to the White House, attention has focused once again on revenge. But what is revenge, and what fuels it? Why did Trump spend a great deal of time telling Americans that his presidency was going to be filled with vengeance?

Readers of my Substack won’t be surprised to learn, given the above reference to DT, that my answer is narcissism. Narcissism is that aspect of the human condition with which, once we become conscious around the age of eighteen months, we are saddled. All human beings are born narcissistic because that is an essential consequence of becoming conscious well before the maturity and authenticity of an individual’s mental model. An eighteen month old child has little more than the bare bones of their mental model, which, if they are lucky, they will hone, sophisticate and improve during their lifetime. But that leaves childhood full of narcissism: the selfishness, the lack of reality, the inability to empathise, the rage. And the desire for revenge. As the great SF author Frank Herbert pointed out, revenge is for children.

Narcissism, then, in my definition, is the acquisition of consciousness by the nascent, incomplete, inauthentic self.

Narcissism is an essential tool for infants and children. Its power to focus on the self above the real world is akin to a mental gravitational force. This force allows the building of an identity. It is the force pulling together chaotic and impressionistic aspects of character and of the real world which otherwise, because of the child’s incomplete mental model, would remain disjointed and inefficient. Narcissism is a bit like glue. It sticks things together until they achieve a natural synergy. This synergy is based in the real world - in reality.

This is why narcissism is not something developed in later life, like an illness or a condition. It is something we all have as children, which we have a responsibility to overcome. The overcoming of personal narcissism matches the replacement of the child’s inaccurate, inauthentic mental model with one that reflects reality, including of the self. It is literally the finding of reality over fantasy. This is why intensely narcissistic individuals like Trump act as children, perpetually self-deceiving; in Trump’s case, he is mocked in that style. Trump has not developed beyond the typical six year old.

Revenge, then, comes from this mental force. When identity, when the whole self, is fragile and held together only by narcissism, it is vulnerable to attack. Any perceived mockery, disrespect or assault, real or not, is a threat to the narcissist’s stability. For that is how they perceive it - as something which diminishes them, which has the potential to damage them. The reality or relevance of such slights is immaterial. At once the narcissist has to act to return their fantasy world to its former position; not doing this would lead to fragmentation, confusion, danger. Revenge is the form of this readjustment that we see in society. “Getting back at people,” as Lenny put it, is a rebalancing designed to place the revenger above the victim, so that their narcissistic, self-deceiving version of themself is returned to its former position. Narcissists cannot and do not defer to reality.

This is why all narcissistic people have a strong desire for revenge. We see it too in narcissistic groups, religious groups especially, but elsewhere also, where the sense of secure identity is so undeveloped and fragile revenge is essential. Wherever we see a thirst for revenge we can be sure narcissism lurks.

As with Trump, such vengeance is pursued regardless of reality. It is pursued for its own sake, that the importance of the self and its cohesion is assured. People like Trump, Napoleon et al need to replace reality with their imaginary version of it to mentally survive. Without that intense, malignant narcissism, Trump would psychologically collapse. The fragments of his character are being held together by that childhood mental glue, which he has never overcome. It is why he has no sense of reality, why he demands complete loyalty (“verging on self-negation,” as one of Napoleon’s generals put it), and why he sees himself and what he represents as superior to anything else - which is why he is a misogynist and a racist. It is why he continues to harp on about revenge.

He will never give up on his personal grievances. His mental condition will not allow him to. None of the foundations of America are anything like as important as his own needs and desires, including, unfortunately, the Constitution. Thus does he make himself boy-king of that nation.